Stress of being a family caregiver
Auburn Pub had a great article on the increase of family caregivers, and the problem of burn out, frustration, and exhaustion that naturally arises. The article is based on information from New York but the results and demographics apply nationwide.
2.2 million New York residents are the caretakers of a parent, spouse, grandparent or friend. Their work is worth about $25 billion, which reduces state and federal health care costs, according data from the AARP, and allows the sick to remain at home. T he emotional cost for caregivers is immeasurable. Many caregivers have only a few hours to themselves a week, become secluded from their community because those they care for cannot leave home or be left alone, and neglect their own health from being so focused on the health of someone who will not get better.
More than half of caregivers live with the person they care for, and spend with that person anywhere from 10 hours a week to 24 hours day, according to a study by the state Office for the Aging that surveyed 1,109 caregivers between May and June 2008. The study, which aimed to identify New York's caregivers and their needs, found that the average caregiver is a white female caring for a parent or a husband.
The study, “Sustaining Informal Caregivers,” shows that a majority of caregivers, 75 percent, care for someone who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease or another form of dementia. About half say the person they care for cannot be left alone. They reported an average of 10.3 hours a day spent providing care - more than a full-time job.
Guilt, isolation and physical exhaustion are only a few of the side effects of full-time care giving. The job can have serious health consequences, said Dr. David Strickland, director of the Center for Behavioral Health at Auburn Memorial Hospital.
Full-time caregivers commonly experience clinical depression, sleep deprivation and inadequate nutrition. The frustration that builds while caring for another person day in and day out can turn into anger, and anger can lead to depression or thoughts of harming the person receiving care, Strickland said. He said the guilt of feeling negatively toward someone whom they still love often leads caregivers to ignore mental health problems, such as suicidal feelings.
“Accept these things do occur and are not to be ashamed of,” Strickland said, rather than ignoring - and exacerbating - the problem.
Caregivers should contact a doctor with any serious health problems, but interaction with others, especially other caregivers, can help manage the daily stress, Strickland said.
Cayuga County's Office for the Aging networks caregivers, educates them about the diseases they deal with and helps them find ways to cope, by connecting them to aids, recommending day programs or just lending an open ear. The decision to make the move to a nursing home is among the hardest decisions caregivers make. But it is a move Strickland advises caregivers to see as an opportunity. Nursing homes can manage the daily hygiene and medication that are among the most stressful tasks of caring for someone, making time spent together enjoyable again, he said.
“You don't have to be a caregiver,” Strickland said. “You can be a sibling, a child, a relative.”
The fear that nursing home staff will not be able to provide adequate personalized care available at home is a major reservation for people considering the move.
Coping strategies
Tips for stressed caregivers from Dr. David Strickland, director of the Center for Behavioral Health at Auburn Memorial Hospital:
Recognize you are not alone - join a support group. Resources such as the county Office for the Aging and the Alzheimer's disease Web site can direct you to groups for caregivers that meet regularly.
Take time for yourself - write it in your schedule. Even if you can spare only an hour, spend a little time every week doing something you enjoyed doing before you became a full-time caregiver.
Build a relief system. Keep in touch with friends and family who can lend a hand in caretaking or lend an ear to listen when you need to talk.
Look into respite care. Many facilities offer overnight stays for both you and the person you care for that allow you to take a break without being far away.
Do not ignore your mental health. Know the signs of depression - sleeplessness, guilt, hopelessness, and suicidal thoughts - and consult a doctor if you recognize them in yourself.
I am a Family Caregiver to my husband who is mentally and physically disabled from a stroke in 2000. After 10 years of caring for my husband with little help from anyone else, my coping ability is weakening as time goes on.
Concerned, I went to see my doctor about of the signs of depression - sleeplessness, guilt, hopelessness, and suicidal thoughts, only to have him reply, “Yah, but see how well your husband is doing.”
Xahnia @ www.familycaregiverhugs.com
I have expressed the following thoughts before on several blogs. However, I believe they are worth repeating. Caregiver burnout is a major issue for those with this awesome responsibility. Don't overlook the role of humor to make things more bearable. Things that made me angry and frustrated when my mother (who had dementia)was alive, in retrospect are filled with funny happenings. This is true too for the many caregivers who read my blog and contact me about my book which emphasizes humor as a healing balm. Caregivers need all the emotional support they can get.
Bob Tell, Author
Dementia Diary, A Caregiver's Journal
Ebook: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/9565
Print edition: http://www.dementia-diary.com
Blog: http://caregiverchronicle.blogspot.com/